The Purpose: The Pinner Proposal

“The Pinner House Proposal is not just about my design, pretty pictures, and events going on at the Pinner House; it’s about the transformation happening within my own heart.”

This season has been very uplifting and exciting, but it has also been very difficult. One thing I have had to wrestle with and process has been the death of my brother. It has been a huge loss to our family. Kurt was always a huge encouragement to me. He believed in me, and my dreams that I expressed to him. Whenever I talked to him I always walked away from the conversation feeling like, "I got this." I have really needed this type of encouragement as I have been developing the Pinner House. The thought of him not being here to see me accomplish this dream has created an intense grieving within my heart.

I have had to fight the voices inside myself that say, "you aren't enough," without his help. This has been challenging, to say the least. I find it much easier to believe what someone else says about me than to examine my own heart and say, "you are good, and you are enough." I honestly often dread self reflection, and it often feels like a waste of time. I am ready to throw off this mindset, and part of how I am doing that is through this blog. The Pinner House Proposal is not just about my design, pretty pictures, and events going on at the Pinner House; it's about the transformation happening within my own heart.

The process of transforming the Pinner House has been messy, overwhelming, frustrating, painful, wonderful, rewarding, invigorating, and healing. If transforming a house is filled with so many struggles and triumphs how much more will it be for transforming my own heart? The transformation might be messy, like pony tail up, lying on the couch crying kind of messy, but that is ok! We are still beautiful, even during those parts. Even when the paints peeling, roofs leaking, and the yard is a mess; the architecture and bones of a house can still be remarkably beautiful. Let's stop looking at all things wrong with us and start looking at the remarkable structure God has built within us. Lets step back and say, "that is something I can work with," and be patient with ourselves as we begin to fix the broken places.

I would like to dedicate The Pinner Proposal to Kurt. For all of the encouragement he gave me, and the worth he showed me that I have within myself. He will forever remain in my heart as my biggest fan.

My goal with The Pinner Proposal is to honor his spirit of encouragement and bring it to others. To encourage myself and others in the way that he did. I might be describing the transformation happening within my own heart, but I hope that it might speak to the transformation happening within your own heart as well. We are not alone in this life, let's all remember that.